Steps

~Piper Rain

I can feel your contempt for me,
It’s all my fault I’m sure
I armor myself, soon I’m free,
The damage is endured

Mind Solid, Spirit Strong
Removing myself from the throng
Breaking the chains, the traps, the box
Though they’re all still there and locked

I see them now,
Avoid them
I’m breathing now,
Despite them
I’m still choking but the pressure’s going away

I refuse to fight,
I hate conflict
But it’s “unavoidable” and “right”
Especially when you self-inflict

Take your “justice,” it’s all yours
Don’t expect me to participate
Don’t think me weak, you’ve seen my scars
But I refuse to instigate

No satisfying sweet revenge
Judicial or profound amends
I already know the end
I only have to get there

You will figure it out, you’ll see,
Or you won’t, but it no longer changes me.

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Howl

~Piper Rain

I cringed while you were speaking
Caught a glimpse of your “reality”
I felt a searing pain as it set fire to a blade that’s been lodged for so long I had forgotten it was there
“Real” people don’t do that
“Real” people live happily within their status quo
And it’s simply not possible step outside of that….

I hear a howl in the distance, no
Not in the distance, I feel it
Echoing from deep within my bones
Resonating
Reverberating
Recharging
Reviving
Ready to be released

She is poised, stoic,
Eyes to the moon
You will not cage her.
She howls again and is now answered
The chorus of her kin, her pack
They knew who she was all along
They’ve been waiting
Turns out, she’s not a person after all

Survive

My every thought and action are carefully considered,

lest I draw any sort of attention to myself, because:

That’s just being a melodramatic

One never wants to give the impression of seeking attention,

Seeking Good Attention indicates arrogance,

Bad Attention- desperation

But there’s fixation on my situation and it leaves me unsettled,

I’m frozen, tiptoeing through my room at night

Don’t make a sound

Let everyone believe you’re asleep

Find me some bottles covered in candle wax, incense, and vanilla body spray

I could be fourteen again,

But I’m not and this is stupid.

Every sound seems amplified,

As I sneak and creep and hide,

lest I draw any sort of attention to myself, because:

That’s just being a melodramatic

They’re going to think you’re lying,

You’re best just not to speak,

Liar, manipulator, user, whore

Let the razors speak for you

They will believe you now,

Right?

Instead you’re told that

You’re not in pain, you’re contrived,

You’re being dramatic,

And you need to quit,

lest you draw any sort of attention to yourself because:

That’s just being melodramatic

Now, I am a shield for my children,

Their perfect little hearts and minds should not endure this and,

I’ve never truly been afraid that I wasn’t strong enough,

Until now.

I am a warrior, a protector, and a vindicator,

But I have been in battle for so damn long,

So, I’ve begun to duck and hide whenever possible,

lest I draw any sort of attention to myself because:

That’s just being melodramatic

Shadow

Am I so masochistic?

 

I turn them over in my mind

These words,

Silver bullets penetrating

Hemorrhaging,

The world reels as they echo

Again

Again

 

Same words, different faces

I turn inward

Is this who I am?

Analyzing introspection

Reevaluating every thought and action

Overreaching, over compensating until I’m overwhelmed

paralyzed

Withdraw, close, shut down

Why?

 

These words they can’t describe me

I can’t possibly be that misunderstood

These insults and allegations

This slander and coercion

These are weapons, nothing more

They’re not truths

They’re not revelations

They’re just bullets

 

How are they so easily wielded?

I load the gun for you,

I bare my heart to you

I ask you not to kill me

Then I’m surprised when you do

 

Am I so masochistic?

Out of the Frying Pan

Into the fire

Like a Tolkien-esque riddle

I find myself pondering

 

There’s no doubt

That I went from the frying pan to the fire

The question is whether the escape is back through the frying pan

 

Logic says no

 

Intuition says yes

 

I can’t always trust intuition when it comes to people I care about

I see the best

I see what could be

I overlook what is

 

What is presently is a double edged sword that skins and slices no matter which way I turn

I don’t want to go back to the frying pan without it having ample time to cool

But the fire is quickly burning me alive and there’s a safety line

 

Fuckin take it! My heart screams

But I sense the familiar rhythm

The echoed words

I’ve already shouldered my responsibility

 

This is not on me

This is not on me

This is not on me

 

That’s not the point

That can be dealt with in time

Are you ready to deal?

I am,

I’ve been ready

Are

You?

 

Who is Piper Rain?

I am the darkness

I am light

A poet and a sacrifice

I dream the day and fight the night

My head stays in the clouds,

relentlessly I wander

My feet they barely touch the ground

Divination,

Cards I ponder

Pied Piper,

Piper Rain,

Purify and sing again,

These sanguine tears are not in vain

I’ll be dramatic, I’ll be tragic

I’ll be the catalyst for magic,

I will be open, I’ll be free

Exactly what I want to be

Maiden, Mother, Crone is she

Insist my heart, so mote it be.

Salutations and merry meet my friends.  My utmost desire for this blog is the opportunity to open up and embrace who I truly am.  I am a witch.  I am a poet.  I like to read tarot cards as a hobby.  I am a writer.  I am a creator of characters and worlds.  My name is Piper Rain, I am thirty five years old, I have a lot of life behind me, and much more still ahead.

Soul Sisters

Soul Sisters, spells and sage,

Wonderfully wild and wicked

Wisdom well beyond the age

With mother earth, connected

 

Witches born and witches burned

Healers, helpers, heart and home

Every scratch and scar we’ve earned

Recorded in the witches tome

 

Divination, Incantation

Health and harvest celebration

Give us now our voice to speak

Hear us now, so mote it be.